Thursday, January 25, 2007

are women their own worst enemies?

I was blessed to be raised by a "mother" who instilled strenght and character in my sisters and i despite the labels she had to live thru.(she let us speak our minds even as children and that was not popular at the time in Naija culture)
i had to give a little glimpse into my childhood before i unleash my insanity on the world..
when i was much younger, there were instances when i had witnessed or heard of a female being ill treated or abused i got very angry at the female for allowing the particular incident remain very vivid to me.
i came home to find my sister in law beaten black and blue. here's the conversation:

me: kilo sele? ( what happened here?)

her: sisi kalifonia! sisi sisi kalifonia! (crying){ she can't call me by my given name in the naija culture}

me:stop crying and tell me what happened.

her: iya ti je mi o... mo ti gbe o(i have suffered...)

me :kilo sele, who did this to u?

her:egbon yin ni, egbon yin ni o (still crying)

me: e pele, please stop crying...(i help her up )
where's my broda?(me assuming they had to rush him to luth or some other hospital)
her:he has gone out.

me:is he okay? (i was afraid he was seriously hurt)

her:eni to gbe soyoyo lati wa okay(apparently she got the beating because she wanted to know what the soyoyo was doing in his car)

me: soyoyo in lagos ? should i call mr olaiya for help ?( panicking) {i assumed my mum was not home since her car was not in the driveway}

her:(looking at me strange) help for wetin?

me: the soyoyo now!!

her: (bursting into laughter) your mum is home

me: (rushing to my mum's side of the house, she looked like she had been crying too)mum, what are you doing here and not trying to help broda with the Soyoyo people?

mum:ni suru sista primate! your broda does not need any help,soyoyo gan lo need help

me:(confused) kile mean?(mum and sista in law now laughing hard)

then my mum explained that "soyoyo" was a bleached woman and not the oloro masqurade.
just then my broda walked in looking spic span without a scratch on him.

i was livid, i turned to my sister in law
me: u should be ashamed look at him! he doesnt even have a scracth on him!
are your hands broken? what kind of a woman are you? eni to ye kigbobi ko.

soyoyo nbo

looking back now i know that i was lashing out at the wrong person and was adding insult to injury, but i can' t but wonder why some women put up with that kind of crap